But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Randomize
