My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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