so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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