Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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