i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Someone shattered a urinal.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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