You just made me feel so damn special
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
