he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
