I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize