Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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