She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
