I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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