SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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