I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
