dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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