If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
