did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize