Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
