BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
