this beer tastes like vomit already
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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