It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
There's always time for handjobs
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
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