you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
