it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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