Having a random hookup so left but love u
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
