There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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