I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
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