just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
