He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I think your dad took our porno
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
