Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
