i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Someone came in the potted fern
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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