What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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