she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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