i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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