It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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