Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
3pm strippers are depressing
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize