does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
