I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
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Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
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when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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