my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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