Do you still have your period?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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