you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
