The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize