Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
