I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
