i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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