How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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