i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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