I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
