I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
