I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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