ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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