Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
